Break Free from the Spirit of Control

Healing Ancestral Wounds

By Gena Barnhill @BarnhillGena

When we think about a controlling person, we often imagine one who is manipulative. Did you know that manipulative behavior may be the result of a negative ancestral influence in the person’s lineage? Someone in the past opened the door to the spirit of control. In other words, they gave the spirit of control a legal right to remain. This spirit will continue to manifest itself in various ways throughout the generations until it is stopped.

The good news is that the spirit of control’s power can be broken. First, we need to recognize this spirit and then renounce it and repent for anyone who partnered with it. Then, we declare that we break its power over us and our future generations in Jesus’s name.

Jesus said in Luke 10:19, “Behold, I have given you authority to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall hurt you.” We have the power to break negative ancestral influences in Jesus’s name.

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The Many Faces of the Spirit of Control 

We have heard pastors say control is a form of witchcraft because it uses counterfeit spiritual authority, not the Holy Spirit, to manipulate others. We need to rely on the Holy Spirit and not a counterfeit spirit to guide and protect us.

When we don’t know who we are in Christ, we try to hide our shame by resorting to controlling ourselves and others. The spirits of shame, fear, and control often work together in an attempt to protect us from exposing our shortfalls. If we feel shame, then the spirit of fear tells us if others see our faults, they won’t accept or love us. We then believe we must control our environment and others so no one sees our perceived inadequacy.

A person under the influence of a spirit of control may demonstrate some of the following behaviors:

  • manipulate others for their selfish purposes
  • intimidate
  • dominate
  • claim they know best (evidenced by pride)
  • exhibit anger or threats to coerce others to follow what they want
  • instill fear
  • gaslight
  • show signs of bulimia
  • cut themselves

In addition to the above behaviors, the person may use:

  • passivity to manipulate
  • withdrawal
  • denial
  • silent treatment to induce guilt
  • enabling to feel superior
  • appeasement

Sometimes exercising control is appropriate. Parents need to exert control over their young children for their safety and security. In most circumstances, however, no one should exert excessive control over another person.

Appropriate Control Can Become Unhealthy 

We have seen situations where parents used excessive control when their children were young and sought to continue controlling their children later in life. They manipulated them with threats of punishment, abuse, and withdrawal of financial and emotional support. Children can manipulate in return by threatening to expose family secrets, withdrawing support, or even inflicting abuse. These unhealthy relationships are called unhealthy soul ties. Overdependence on another person can signal an unhealthy soul tie that needs healing.

In all these situations, the influence of control seeks to hurt, confuse, create disunity, and isolate people from each other, family, and God. Second Timothy 1:7 reminds us God didn’t give us a spirit of fear. Instead, He gave us power, love, and self-control. We do not need to control others to protect ourselves. When I know who I am in Christ, I realize I have the power of self-control and God’s love.

Breaking Free from the Spirit of Control

  1. First, recognize this negative ancestral influence.
  2. Forgive the people who were influenced by the spirit of control and hurt you.
  3. Ask the Lord to forgive you for partnering with this negative ancestral influence and believing the resulting lies. Then, receive His forgiveness.
  4. Renounce and reject control’s influence over you, your family, and all future family in Jesus’s name.
  5. Ask the Holy Spirit what He wants to fill you with to replace this negative influence. When we renounce and reject the influence of control, He often replaces it with divine peace and a deep understanding of our identity as beloved children of God. There is nothing to fear or be ashamed of when we know the Lord’s unconditional love. Consequently, the need to control others dissolves when God takes away fear and shame. We need to surrender control of our lives to Him, not others.

Questions to Ponder:

Do you recognize a recurrent pattern of control or manipulation in your family line? How will you pray against this negative ancestral influence?

Be sure to leave your thoughts on our Facebook Group Healing Prayer Discussion.

Looking forward to your input.

Blessings,
Gena

Editor’s Note: This post was originally published on October 17, 2022, and revamped for comprehensiveness on November 10, 2024.

In case you missed the rest of the Healing the Ancestral Wounds Series, here is the link for the Archives:

https://simpleeffectiveprayer.com/category/healing-ancestral-wounds/